Includes index.

An introduction for busy parents and professionals -- Part 1. Turning chaos into calm. 1. "This kid is really smart, but...": Six challenge areas for families with complex kids ; 2. "This is not what I expected": Parenting complex kids is different ; 3. "I've tried everything but nothing works": Understanding and redefining parenting success ; 4. "I just want some peace!": The four phases of parenting -- Part 2. The new paradigm for parenting like a coach. 5. "Where do I start": You can do it all, but not at the same time (take aim) ; 6. "Why can't they just...?": No one knows your child better than you do ; 7. "My kid's just not motivated": How to get your kids to... [fill in the blank] ; 8. "Everyone's so tense all the time": It's not what you say, it's how you say it ; 9. "I don't know what's realistic": Set appropriate expectations and consequences ; 10. "I need a strategy for...": Structures that actually work -- Part 3. Turning information into action. 11. "They need to be able to do this on their own.": Cultivating ownership gradually and then suddenly ; 12. "How do I know if it's working?": Bringing it all together -- Afterword: A letter from Elaine and Diane -- Discussoin group guide -- Resources.